Happy Tree Estates
by Number1PixarFan
Summary: Happy Tree Estates is a cheerful neighborhood, and certainly nothing could ever go wrong. But one day, two men come to tell the residents that they all must die. This outlines the potential origins of the Happy Tree Friends videos. Humanized characters.
1. A Perfect Town

**A/N: On the day I publish this first chapter, I have not been watching Happy Tree Friends for any longer than a week. I'm still not totally sure why I even enjoy it. The sick gore is not funny at all for me. I actually like it because despite the blood, it's the most adorable thing in existence that's aimed at people around my age.**

**But the reason I'm jumping into a fanfic for it so quickly is that it's the kind of show that absolutely demands fanfiction to be written for it. There are so many questions: Why do these terrible things happen in the first place? How do they keep coming back to life? And the characters are so one-dimensional that there's a lot of room for them to be explored.**

**My theory is that there is no universe where these things actually happen to adorable little cartoon creatures. But there **_**is **_**a universe – a human universe – where the Happy Tree Friends shorts serve a more serious purpose than just for malicious teenagers to get a sick laugh out of it. That would be the universe in this story. Aside from two OC antagonists and some other OC's for when the story demands them, every character is a humanized version of an HTF character. The HTF videos are in-universe propaganda. If you want more details, you'll have to read it!**

**Oh, one last thing. I gave all of the characters human names, so it might get confusing. Characters like Petunia, whose names can pass off as human, have been left the same, but for the rest of them, the only nominal evidence of their identities are last names or nicknames that sound reminiscent. At the end of each chapter, I'll give a character list for anyone new who's introduced. Try to figure out who they all are before then!**

**I hope you enjoy the first chapter. Please R&R!**

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><p>Billy Cuddles burst out the front door. What a beautiful morning! The grass was so green and the sky was such a wonderful shade of blue. Billy pulled on his favorite pair of shoes – pink bunny slippers, which are all the rage with dudes nowadays, thank you very much – and ran down the street.<p>

Days always seemed beautiful at Happy Tree Estates. It was an expensive and exclusive place in which to live, but one you were there, you'd realize it was worth the effort to get in. It was a friendly neighborhood, and almost everyone was nice. There were a couple of nutcases, but it was a pleasant life despite them.

As he walked along, one of said nutcases crashed into Billy. "Ha-ha! Sorry! Sorry!" the guy laughed. He was Patrick "Nutcase" Santoya, the town drunk. Nutcase was the fun kind of drunkard, always convulsing in alcohol-giddy laughter.

Billy smiled and was about to tell him it was no problem, but Nutcase interrupted him, giving him an amicable (but still a little painful) punch on the arm. "Catch ya later, Bunny Slippers!" he giggled as he stumbled away.

He was crazy and his skin and clothes were always stained with liquor, but Billy considered Nutcase a friend. Actually, Billy was friends with everyone. His best friend, however, was one Ethan Tooley, a gap-toothed, freckled guy with awful luck. The two of them were part of a larger group consisting also of three girls.

The first, who had pink eyes and wore a ton of makeup, was waiting for Billy at the park, and when she saw him walking towards them, she squealed. Leaving her friends to play on a swingset, she ran to him, threw her arms around his neck, and kissed him wildly. "How's my Billy Bunny today?"

Sue Giggs was Billy's girlfriend. He loved her for several reasons: she was sweet, and she always had a twinkle in her rosy eyes.

"The sun is shining, isn't it?" Billy said. "I'm feeling great and ready for anything."

Sue frowned and took a step back. "Anything, Billy? Anything? Don't do anything stupid. Please?" She was very sweet but she also kept Billy grounded. He tended to have a mischievous streak, and without her, he might have gotten into a lot of trouble.

Billy said, "Okay!" and tickled Sue under her chin. As she giggled, he waved to the rest of the gang. "Hey, guys!"

Sue's best friend, Petunia, answered by laughing, her feet kicking above her head as the swing sent her soaring. Ethan was on the swing next to her, and as she swung forward, he swung back. They were like a pendulum.

"Come on, Nick, there's nothing to be afraid of," Ethan was calling when Billy and Sue reached the playground.

A third girl with short, short hair bit her lip and eyed the third empty swing that Ethan wanted her to go on. "No," she said, holding onto the swingset's metal bars for dear life. As she shook her head, flakes of dandruff rained over her shoulders. "I can't. Just watching you guys is making me nauseous."

"I don't get what you're so scared about. Nothing bad ever happens here," Ethan said.

Suddenly, Petunia screamed.

Nick automatically freaked out. "Oh my God! What's happening?"

"I scuffed my feet on the ground and got dirt on my shoes!" Petunia cried. Sue ran to her and took her to get a change of footwear before the poor OCD-diagnosed girl hyperventilated to death.

But if that was the kind of thing that could _make _a resident hyperventilate to death, then Ethan was right. Nothing catastrophic had happened at Happy Tree Estates for decades. The atmosphere was obviously so carefree that a group of teenagers didn't feel at all self-conscious about playing on a swingset.

Nick (short for Nicole) Flynn believed that if life was perfect, it meant something devastating was looming on the horizon.

But as Billy sat comfortably on a swing, rocking back and forth, inhaling the scent of that fresh, green grass, he knew that Nick was wrong. They were lucky to live in such a place. Nothing would ever go wrong. They were forever safe.

He yawned and stretched, feeling relaxed. Over his shoulder, he caught sight of a giant television screen. It was attached to the huge tree – the Happy Tree – that served as the town hall, and it had been under construction for weeks. "What do you think the screen is for?" he asked.

"It's going to fall and smash on the ground before it's used for anything. I hope it does, too, because the aliens probably planted it," Nick answered, always prepared with a conspiracy theory.

"What would the aliens need to do with a giant TV screen?" Ethan wondered.

"They'd have to brainwash us so they – AAHH!" Nick jumped back a mile when someone pushed past her suddenly.

"Whoa!" Ethan shouted. He was flying forward to the point where he couldn't stop himself, and his feet collided with the blurry figure running in front of him. He fell off his swing and landed face down in the dirt.

Yeah. At the Happy Tree Estates, they were safe from danger but not safe from morons like the tall, lanky guy who was sitting up groggily, trying to get over having gotten a shoe in the face.

Billy shot the kid a look. "What are you doing, Lombard?"

Irwin Lombard stood up, having trouble meanwhile keeping his balance. He was college kid without a passion or purpose of existence besides being a nuisance. He was in the town more or less illegally, as he lived in the basement of an old recluse who was so blind he didn't even notice. Despite this, his clumsiness, and his lacking common sense, Lombard thought he was better and smarter than everyone.

"Everyone has to come to the Happy Tree!" he blubbered, waving his arms around excitedly.

Ethan groggily lifted his head up. "_Why?" _he groaned.

Lombard jumped around and sputtered, having difficulty getting the words out. "There's – there's these two guys, and they, they're saying everyone has to come listen to them!"

Billy laughed and rolled his eyes. "Yeah, ri –"

Just then, he was cut off by the sound of a giant television set clicking on. He gasped and looked to see that the TV that had been a minute ago dead now displayed an all-blue screen.

Lombard started running. "Come on!"

"Those men are the aliens, aren't they?" Nick said as she, Billy, and Ethan took off running.

They reached the city square to find a sizable crowd. Already, Billy could see that whatever event this was, it was some sort of spectacular big deal. It was hard to get so much of the town's population gathered in one spot. Billy was actually having trouble seeing who it was that was speaking, and so he was trying to find the optimum toe-standing position for seeing over the head of the old man in front of him when he felt a hand on his shoulder.

There was Sue, sweaty and red-faced. "Billy! Don't . . . run . . . so fast. I've gotta . . . keep up, you know," she panted. Petunia stood next to her, equally as exhausted but not as sweat-soaked, since she carried around a super-absorbent towel in her purse.

"Sorry," Billy whispered, his already rosy cheeks becoming a deeper red. "There's something big and important going on right now and we needed to get here fast. Look, there's these guys speaking –"

"Good morning, residents of Happy Tree Estates," boomed a man's amplified voice, cutting Billy off. "My name is Dr. Zander Grayski, and this is my partner, Dr. Harrison Wexler." A pause. "Dr. Wexler is a mute, so I will be doing all of the talking for our little group."

Once Billy's line of sight reached past the old man, he got his first look at the visitors. First of all, they were both wearing lab coats. Dr. Wexler was tiny and cross-eyed. He was visibly nothing more than a right-hand man to Dr. Grayski, a towering, thin man with thin glasses and dark, waxy hair. His eyes peered cruelly over the body of cheerful and curious citizens, and when he spoke, his words were somehow both serious and wry. "We come from an organization branching off from the FBI called the Department of Examinations And Terminations. Our specialization is watching over intense threats to society and extinguishing them in a way that will keep it as discreet from the common population as possible.

"Happy Tree Estates has been a recurring interest of ours for several years now," Grayski continued. "You may consider yourselves lucky to live in a beautiful place like this. Though we will not argue with you that your hometown is lovely, we've had some concerns. Such a bright and happy town, with exceptionally low crime rates despite lenient government attitudes, is grounds for suspicion."

At this point, there wasn't a single murmur going through the crowd. Every single person was listening intently to the powerful voice that filled the town square, even the smallest of children who could not understand. Nobody could fathom what this scientist might be leading up to.

"After intense observation of daily goings-on, Dr. Wexler and I are sorry to report . . . Well, you can all see for yourselves." Grayski was stoic as he pressed a button on a remote and he, along with the rest of the town, turned to watch the giant TV screen.

A title screen popped up, with bright colors, bouncy lettering, and an excited song in gibberish playing in the background. _Happy Tree Friends, _it read. The screen shifted shortly thereafter to a cartoon forest scene featuring two anthromorphized critters (a yellow rabbit and a pink chipmunk) playing Frisbee.

And it was cute. It was cuter than cute, in fact. It was absolutely adorable. The two characters sported teeny little hearts for noses and spoke with the most precious-sounding nonsense sounds ever. When the chipmunk dropped the Frisbee, she giggled. Half the audience went "_Aww!" _

Suddenly, a purple beaver noticed them and decided he wanted to join in. He jumped between the rabbit and chipmunk, to their surprise, and leaped in the air, ready to catch the flying Frisbee . . .

And then, Nick emitted a bloodcurdling scream. Grayski shouted, "Young man, please be quiet!" but Nick wasn't even fazed by yet another stranger mistaking her for a male. In fact, what had happened to cause the scream was enough to make several other people panic as well.

Because on that TV screen, in that precious little forest world, a Frisbee had just spun out of control and spliced right through the neck of a purple beaver, splattering animated blood everywhere and sending his head, with eyes pulled from their sockets, rolling towards the feet of the chipmunk.

The chipmunk yelped at the sight, and was soon after squashed herself in a shower of blood by a falling tree that the wayward Frisbee had chopped in half. The rabbit tried to run from the tree, but while he managed to avoid it, he tripped on the string of tissue attached to the dead beaver's loose eyeballs, smashing his head in when he hit the ground. Before the screen switched to an innocuous _The End _title card, Billy noticed with apprehension that the rabbit was wearing pink bunny slippers not unlike his own.

A terrified roar erupted throughout the crowd. Older girls and women began to hyperventilate, while younger and more fragile children cried. A man shouted, "What the hell _is _this?"

Suddenly, a huge clap of thunder boomed, effectively shutting everyone up. They looked to see that it had been caused by Dr. Wexler clapping his hands in front of the microphone.

"Thank you, Dr. Wexler!" Grayski said, obviously irritated. "Now, all of you, listen to me! The Department of Examinations and Terminations has found a highly dangerous and inhumane underground crime circle within Happy Tree Estates. It's a problem that needs to be quickly remedied. We've created this series of short videos called _Happy Tree Friends _to help you help us. Each one of you has been turned into an animal character for this series, in which, as you see, each episode contains a different set of horrific deaths for your character." He smiled grimly, and for the first time, he seemed like a real mad scientist. "They act as a catalog from which you are to choose your method of extermination."

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><p><strong>AN: So, here are the characters so far:**

**Billy is Cuddles  
><strong>"**Nutcase" is Nutty  
><strong>**Sue is Giggles  
><strong>**Ethan is Toothy  
>Nick is Flaky<br>****Petunia is Petunia (duh)  
><strong>**Irwin Lombard is Lumpy  
><strong>**The scientists are OC's**

**I hope you liked Chapter Uno. Please review!**


	2. Cause for Alarm?

**A/N: So, this chapter is a bit short. There's a whole story I could tell about why, but what I'll say is that it all comes down to pacing.**

**And hey, look at that. Short author's note, too.**

**Hope you like this chapter. R&R!**

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><p>"We have six straight hours of material and you have one year to decide. Go about your lives, Happy Tree residents. But heed the screen. It will be constantly streaming videos out of the series, twenty-four hours a day, for all of you to watch. Good day." With that, Dr. Grayski shut off the microphone and, closely followed by Dr. Wexler, entered the city hall and locked the door behind them.<p>

Turmoil erupted in their absence. Everywhere, people were running, sobbing, fainting. Shouts of "We're all going to die!" and "Was he serious?" came from every direction, from men, women, girls, and boys of all ages.

Billy pushed past several frantic people, though he had no idea where he was trying to go. Away from all this panic, he supposed, but he knew that it would be everywhere in the town until this year was up. And he was panicked himself. As he'd watched the rabbit smash his head in on the cheerful, green, cartoon ground, he'd had a premonition that the rabbit was supposed to be _him. _

He would have to run away. Yes! Obviously, the problem had to do with the town of Happy Tree Estates itself, not him! Billy was involved in not a single crime circle. As an innocent waiting for an unfair death, he could save himself. He was born free!

And then, Billy's world came crashing down. A hysterical woman jostled him in the ribs, making his feet stumble and catch. He was ready for his forward fall to be broken by his face, but a pair of arms caught him before the grisly fate of the rabbit could be met.

"Oh, Billy! Billy, oh God, oh God!" His eyes made contact with Sue's. The pink color of her irises now tinted the whites of her eyes and her eyelids. She had been crying. "That chipmunk . . . it had my bow!" she whispered, voice shaky. She patted her neat bun which, lo and behold, was held in place by a full, bright pink bow that matched the one on the head of the chipmunk.

"The bunny had my slippers," Billy said breathlessly. The two trembled in each others' arms as they tried to avoid being trampled by the masses.

"All of you, stop it! Are you seriously freaking out over this shit?"

Like a deathly game of Stop and Go, the whole crowd froze to listen. A bespectacled young man had climbed atop the podium and now stood hands on hips with a look of pity for his townspeople.

"Really! Do you all believe that those loons could really do any of these things to us?" he shouted. "They're scientifically impossible!" He gestured above his head. Onscreen, an anteater was having its guts torn out through its snout. The image made several people cringe, but the boy demanded everyone's attention by virtue of being a teen genius. "There's no way for these 'scientists' to prove that they're capable of atrocities like this. Everyone, go home! Don't run around like gullible sheep!"

"How do you know this?" a woman shouted.

This offended Ty Sifford. Everyone knew he was a child prodigy and therefore knew that much more than anyone by default. "Trust me!" he proclaimed. "And if you don't believe me, come back tomorrow and I'll have a whole argument prepared."

Ty Sifford was so confident in himself that it was hard for him to not convince at least a few people. The atmosphere immediately grew calmer at his reassurance, not figuring in the nervous few who were still shaking and crying on the ground.

Among them, Nick, who continued to shake as she stood. "Yeah, why don't we all go home?" she cried. "Maybe we'll wake up tomorrow morning and it will have all been a dream!"

She was being sarcastic, but soon after she'd said it, she was trampled by a whole town of people running home.

"_Ow . . . _" she whined as Billy and Ethan helped her stand again. After being passed by a bewildered Ty Sifford leaving to follow his own advice, the group of friends (and Lombard) were the only ones left in the square.

Ethan was more shaken than any of his companions. Though he was trying to support dizzy Nick on his shoulder, he soon felt so weak that he had to sit down. "The beaver," he said. "He was _me!"_

"How could you tell?" Sue wondered.

Ethan replied by grimacing and exhaling. The air whistled as it passed through the prominent gap in his front teeth. Eyes widened as his friends realized why the beaver had seemed so familiar. Ethan then fell backwards, rubbing his neck tentatively all the while.

Nick and Petunia cried and grieved for their victimized friends. But Lombard was appalled by their sympathies. "Are y'all crazy or something? Like Ty pointed out, the scientifical impossibilites are so staggeringly big that you'd have to be a total moron to really believe it."

Petunia coughed. "Irwin," she said, "look at the screen."

Lombard spun around to look and spun back unconvinced. Petunia had spotted the Happy Tree Friend who was quite obviously him. "Just proves my point further," he said. "I would never, ever take a job in Animal Control. Those guys couldn't have been really watching us!"

Suddenly, Ethan jumped up with a violent stomachache. He ran home before he could vomit all over the square. He had just witnessed something that had unnerved him greatly: his character – resurrected – being strangled by the appendages of a giant squid. That was twice in ten minutes he'd seen himself killed, and though it was now the world record in frequency of witnessing one's own death, he was understandably not excited.

It unnerved Nick as well. She bolted home, screaming "Oh God!" repeatedly.

Four others followed her, Lombard haughty and the rest sad and scared. They hid where the rest of the town had gone – home – and that was where they remained.

The beautiful day was over. It was only 10:00 a.m. and the sun was still warm, but those scientists had taken a wet towel, dampened everyone's spirits, and started to suffocate them as well. Although the sun was bright and high in the air, it failed to register in Billy's eyes. The sky might as well have been gray to him. Gray was the color of sadness, and sadness was connected to death, and whether or not death was imminent, it was taking over his thoughts.

By nightfall, most people had calmed themselves. They couldn't see the screen from inside, and having been away for several hours let them start to forget what the Happy Tree Friends even looked like. They took to their beds, praying the next morning would in fact reveal that it had been a dream.

What nullified those hopes was the one woman who stayed awake and alert all night in what was clearly a very grim reality. She was convinced that Grayski spoke the truth. She feared for her family and she needed to know their potential fates.

That horrific curiosity made her sneak out of her home after the rest of the Estates were asleep. She sat outside the entire night, taking in every gory second of the continuous footage. She recognized everyone in the videos from their idiosyncracies – one of the things she had used to love about the Estates was how idiosyncratic everyone was. But at the same time, she noticed something that disturbed her greatly, much more than seeing the simulated deaths of friends and neighbors did.

Those scientists wanted to be cryptic, it seemed. But she needed answers. As the sun rose on a new day, she ran home, woke her husband and their young son, and marched her family to the Happy Tree, waiting for Grayski to unlock the front door.

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><p><strong>AN: Brief character update:**

**Ty Sifford is Sniffles (is it just me, or does he tend to have his guts ripped out through his snout **_**a lot?**_**)**

**The mysterious woman at the end is kind of an OC, kind of not. You'll see. She has a complicated relationship with the canon.**

**I hope the length didn't affect the quality at all and that it was still enjoyable. Stay tuned for chapter three!**


	3. Mother Makes Three

**A/N: A-ha! An update!**

**In this chapter, we meet five new characters who all have one thing in common: they are all bears. Well, in this they're human, but canonically they are bears. My theory for this fic is that all of the characters who are the same species in the show are related in real life, so Pop, Cub, their missing wife/mother, Flippy, and Disco Bear are all one big family. I swear it makes more sense in the story than it does in summary.**

**Well, I hope you enjoy this chapter, which took a bear-y long time to get it the way I wanted.**

**Please R&R!**

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><p>"Where am I in those videos?"<p>

Zander Grayski had woken up relaxed. He had at first turned his nose up when he was offered a room in the Happy Tree Motel, but despite how uncomfortably homey it was, anything was better than a hard laboratory bunk bed. But when he was greeted by the sound of his door opening and the voice of a woman in his room, he returned swiftly to his sour mood.

"If you watch the tapes for long enough, I guarantee you'll find yourself. Now get out of my room, ma'am. If you would be so kind," he said. He continued stirring his coffee as if nothing had interrupted.

"I was watching them _all night._ Not one of those characters could have been me. I'd never be away from my family, who I definitely saw – where. Was. I?"

Grayski lived by this rule: if you act nonchalant, people won't suspect that you're one to be bothered. It gave him the uncanny ability to turn strangers off before they even saw his face, even before he saw theirs. "The Department of Examinations And Terminations does not make a habit of divulging information to individuals. Everything will make sense in due time." Grayski stood quiet, hoping to hear the sounds of footsteps leaving his motel room.

Instead, another proud voice shouted behind him, "Hey, my wife asked you a question! Now, you'll answer her or –"

And that's when the baby started wailing.

Nonchalance be damned. Grayski spun around in shock, as he all of a sudden knew exactly who he was speaking to, and that they were no threat at all. Indeed, the warrior couple that had been demanding answers moments ago was now two young parents cooing over a crying baby.

"Ah, you must be the Behr family. Pop, is it?" Grayski forced a smile and offered his hand to the father.

He was a nervous man wearing a mask of courage that hardly hid anything, quite obvious as he responded. "It's Paul, actually," he said sternly. But the second the baby started crying louder, Paul broke down into a sweaty mess to comfort his child, whispering, "Daddy didn't mean to scare you!"

The scene here was rather beautiful. A mother rocking her baby back and forth, singing softly to him as her husband watched over her shoulder with a desperate expression. It was obvious how much this family cared for one another. Having to break them apart was not the most exciting thing on Grayski's agenda.

He motioned for the woman. "Mabel, come."

Mabel looked up with a stony expression. Grayski cared not one bit for women, but even he had to admit that she was quite lovely, with doll-like eyes, nose, and mouth, and dusty blonde hair that almost matched the color of her skin. Not even the anger she had as she handed the boy to Paul (whose attempts to rock the baby himself were far too jerky) and walked over to the mysterious man could blemish her pretty face.

"Now, Mabel, it hurts me to say this," Grayski fibbed. "If a person in this town is not represented by one of the Happy Tree Friends, then it is very likely that they will have already died by the scheduled time of the termination."

The red passion in Mabel's face paled pink. "W. . . what?"

"Oh, don't be too upset," Grayski said smoothly, trying not to pay attention to the horror in her eyes. "Your fate is a blessing – I'm sure if you were watching all night you saw just how painful the deaths of your neighbors are going to be. Cancer will be a blissful way to go."

"Cancer?" Mabel suddenly felt her legs weaken. They collapsed under her, and she fell backwards onto the neatly-made bed behind her. She felt woozy as she sat up. "You're not serious?"

"Yes, actually. There's a malignant tumor in your gallbladder," Grayski answered as he calmly sipped his coffee.

By this point, Paul had overheard Mabel's diagnosis. He rushed over without realizing he was jostling the baby. "What? No! Can't the gallbladder be removed?" he shouted.

Grayski ignored him. "The town doctor is actually an undercover agent for the Department of Examinations And Terminations. He was asked to keep important information like this from his patients and to instead report back to the organization. So before you get angry for not having learned this sooner, remember that it helped us greatly in laying out the plan." He then raised an eyebrow. "And as for your question, Mr. Behr, let's turn to your wife. Mrs. Behr, do you really _want _to have your gallbladder removed? You've now seen every gory second of the Happy Tree Friends videos. You know what could be waiting for you if you opt for treatment."

All eyes were on Mabel. And she didn't have to think long before she gave her answer. Her lip trembled, and soon, she was sobbing harder than her son ever had since he was born.

Panicked, Paul rushed to put an arm around his wife's shoulders and help her get up. "Dr. Grayski, I think we've heard all we need to from you," he said pointedly. As he did all of this, he was juggling the baby in one arm, and as he walked his wailing family out the motel room's door, he tried to convince himself that, yes, he was competent. However, as he left for home, he was shaking even more than Mabel.

Dr. Grayski sighed and shook his head as he slammed the door shut. _Any more nosy visitors like that_, he thought, _and their fates will be sealed early._

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><p><em>Flashback: One year earlier<em>

"Oh, yes, I understand. I'm more than willing to, but I'll have to talk to my husband before I can give a definite yes." Mabel Behr tried to sound as serious as possible while she held this telephone conversation, but her giddiness over recent news threatened to make her giggle into this police officer's ear at any second.

The officer evidently couldn't detect tone over the telephone. "Alright, then, Mrs. Behr. I'll call again tomorrow night, so please, have an answer by then," he said.

"Oh, of course," Mabel replied. "Thank you, officer." She waited for the authority figure to hang up, then excitedly slammed her own phone down.

"What was that about?" her husband, Paul, asked from his spot at the kitchen table. The couple had just been sitting down for a dinner alone when the officer's call interrupted them.

Mabel sighed. "My sister-in-law is in jail."

Paul's eyes widened. "Oh my God, for what?"

"Multiple cases of breaking and entering."

"Well," Paul sighed, "I can't say I'm surprised."

"Well, just wait until you hear this next part," Mabel said. "She's facing up to _three and a half years, _it was that frequent. And since she's not going to be at home for a while, she wants us to have custody of Dean until they let her out."

Paul frowned. He swallowed his bite of chicken mid-chew and thought for a moment. "Hmm. Do we have to? Are there any relatives of theirs that live closer?"

"No."

He thought for another moment. "Does your father get along with him very well?"

"Just as well as my father gets along with anyone."

And then he thought for one more moment, before finally saying, "Do we _really _have to?" He was not especially fond of their teenage nephew.

"Oh, don't worry, honey! Dean is 16 years old. I'm sure he won't get in our way. And besides, having a kid around will be good practice." Mabel placed a hand on her stomach and smiled.

Her expectant glow was contagious – Paul couldn't help but grin himself. "Alright," he said.

That was the thing about a first pregnancy. It was such a huge change – one that every married couple longed for – that it made any other news seem trivial by comparison. So what if they had to look after a kid for three years? They'd soon be doing it again for eighteen.

Tonight, there would be no drama, just the new parents and their baby-to-be.

"How do you think your dad will react to the news?" Paul asked.

"So long as the baby isn't deaf, he'll be thrilled," Mabel answered with a smirk. "He's always looking for someone new to share those old war stories with."

But this was the extent to which they spoke about telling anyone. It wasn't that it would bring that unwanted drama to the table, or that they wanted to wait before they let anyone else know they were expecting. No, none of that complicated stuff. They simply weren't close enough to anyone else. The Behrs were acquainted with several people throughout Happy Tree Estates, but they were shy guests who were only comfortable with each other.

And the foregone conclusion was that once their baby was born, the family would only get much closer. They might not have contact with the outside world for . . . well, who knew how long?

Mabel savored a piece of the lemon chicken Paul had so thoughtfully prepared – a rare thing for him to have the time for. She mused on what the sentiment of this special chicken could mean for their future: it meant she and her husband had competence. Though they might not be getting much sun, a grandfather, a nephew, and a baby would be no problem for them to handle. All five of them would certainly live long, healthy lives solely through the strength of Paul and Mabel Behr.

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><p><em>Present Day<em>

After Paul helped her stumble through the front door of her own home, Mabel collapsed, convulsing in tears, onto the couch. She wrapped her arms around her son, Cody, and tried to rock him in her shaking arms as they both cried.

"Aw, hell," said a gruff voice from the other side of the living room. "If you knew you were going to do something that'd make a grown woman cry, why would you bring the baby with you?"

Mabel opened her eyes to see the blurry image of her father, one Phillip Bernstein. He was a solidly-built man, living with his daughter for reasons of combat-related injuries, and his outfits always had at least one hint of camouflage in it. One could easily be intimidated by him, but he was really very gentle and well-liked by those who got to know him.

Except, at this moment, his own daughter. Mabel had not seen her father since she'd spent the night watching the videos in the square, and when he reached for his grandson ("Does the baby need a hug from Grandpa?"), all she could picture were the horrible images of Phillip Bernstein's animated alter ego. She sat up and turned Cody away before he could take him from her.

"Daddy," she said, holding back her tears with wobbly breaths, "you haven't been having any of those _flashes, _have you?"

Phillip raised an eyebrow and hesitantly lowered his arms. "No . . . I can't say I have," he muttered. "What flashes?"

Right. This was just her father, not a monster. Mabel reminded herself of this, shook off the fear and said, "Nothing." Then she turned around and buried her face into a pillow, trying to shut away the world.

Her father, not willing to be shut out, sat down next to her. "What's the matter, sweetie? You look like somebody died," he said in the gentle way that Mabel was used to. It reminded her of what she knew to be true.

It calmed her enough to explain. "We were just . . . at the doctor's. He told us that I have a cancerous tumor," she whispered.

Phillip gasped. "A tumor?" He put a hand Mabel's shoulder. "Look at me," he pleaded. "What does this mean?"

His hand felt warm, the kind of warmth that an evil man could never have. Mabel was finally brave enough to turn to face her father. "I was watching the videos in the square last night and I wasn't in any of them. But you were in it, and so were Paul and Dean and Cody. I needed to know _why, _so we confronted that scientist and . . . " She took a shivery breath in. "He said it was because I'd be dead by the time this year was over."

Phillip sighed. "You don't really believe in all that, do you? I was in Vietnam, Mabel. I've seen violence firsthand, enough to make me know how absurd the stuff in those cartoons was."

"What about the cartoons?" The moment was interrupted by a teenage boy coming down the stairs. He wore a fluffy, gaudy orange bathrobe, but his hair wasn't wet. He had a headphone in his left ear. In contrast to the sympathies of the rest of the people in the room, he didn't seem to care at all.

Phillip shook his head. "Nothing, Dean," he said. "Just that they're nothing to worry about." He tried to ignore his inconsiderate grandson as he rocked his daughter, now a little girl willing to cry on her daddy's shoulder, in his arms.

The curly-haired kid shrugged and calmly bopped off towards the kitchen to the beat of his music. "Well, ain't that just groovy," he mumbled carelessly. He was about to stick the other headphone back in when Phillip spoke up again.

"But your aunt _does _have cancer."

Dean spun back around, dumbfounded. "What?"

There was a definite shock that registered on his face, which was a lot more emotion than the family could normally get from him on a daily basis. Maybe he was overreacting. Maybe they'd _all _been overreacting.

Mabel slipped out of Phillip's arms and wiped her eyes. All her fear was suddenly gone. "Don't worry, Dean. I'm starting to think maybe it's not true," she said, with her throat still scratchy from the tears but full of a newfound hope.

"Right. Just keep believing that," Phillip reassured her.

But the happiness didn't last for long, because at that moment, Cody started wailing at the very tip-top of his lungs.

Paul had been trying to distance himself from the conversation and eventually drifted to the still-open door to admire the sunny day outside. But all of a sudden, he saw something far too disturbing. "Um, everyone, you need to come here," he mumbled.

Mabel, Phillip, and Dean all frowned, cautiously standing up and moving to the doorway. And sure enough, to their shock, an unknown, masked man in a lab coat was standing in the street, inexplicably facing their house.

"This guy wasn't in the videos either, Behr family!" he shouted, shaking the arm of a tall, timid fellow – whose head he had a gun to.

Paul looked to his wife for confirmation, and she shook her head. She couldn't remember seeing this poor man at all the previous night.

A crowd had formed on the street. Other families were standing outside their houses, many of them still in their pajamas, groggy from the sleep they'd thought would chase these villains away. The last thread of denial from anyone in the town was snipped away as the faceless official gave the Behrs a nasty look and pulled the trigger, sending red and purple remnants of the man's burst head flying across the sidewalk.

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><p><strong>AN: Hope you enjoyed it! More is on the way. Now, a character update:**

**Paul is Pop  
><strong>**Cody is Cub  
><strong>**Mabel is Pop's wife  
><strong>**Phillip is Flippy (I would like to thank the reviewer who suggested I name him Phil – I wasn't sure what his name should be before.)  
><strong>**Dean is Disco Bear**

**As you might be able to tell, I'm borrowing a little influence from Lost, which I just finished watching in English class. I'm trying for a whole bunch of characters, each with their own histories and flashbacks and stuff. I can guarantee that I will not pull it off as well as the writers of Lost did, but it's fun and good practice for those techniques.**


	4. No Time To Live Wildly

**A/N: Okay, so, long chapter here. Bear with me. It was fun to write, but it took up a lot of space – I actually wanted to add another scene at the end, but it was already several pages long. I'll keep the author's note short just to even things out.**

**Hope you enjoy! Please R&R!**

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><p>The fear and hope of the past twenty-four hours were starting to be a vicious cycle. Billy's emotions had been hurled from one extreme to the other with such intensity that not only did he have no idea what to think, but he also felt a little queasy.<p>

Going outside would be too hard. All morning, the family from across the street had been gathered around the carnage, unable to do anything but stare with tears pouring over their blank expressions. They hadn't allowed room for the Sanitation Department to clean up the mess, and so Billy, unprepared to come face-to-face with the first casualty, was stuck indoors, watching.

"Honey, we all know we're going to die. Spend your last year with your friends if it's all you can do." His mother had red eyes herself, but she'd calmed herself quickly in order to fulfill her duties as a mother. She might have been the first mother in history who'd tried to solve her son's problems by handing him a telephone and making him use it, but there was a first time for everything. "Please, call Ethan. Go have fun."

Billy shook his head. "Mom, I can't go out there," he said hoarsely.

His mother sighed. "That's all the more reason to call your friends," she said, pressing the phone closer to her son's cheek. "Hearing their voices will cheer you up."

Billy begrudgingly obliged. He scowled and yanked the phone out of her hand. He dropped it onto the windowsill in front of him and crossed his arms over his forehead, a signal to his mother that he would do her will _later. _

Yesterday, he'd been glad to live in Happy Tree Estates. But today, all he wanted was the chance to get out and do something with his life besides lounging in the ever-present sun. Today, he realized that what he, at seventeen years old, wanted out of living was something he now would never get to do.

He lifted his head up to watch his neighbors mourn the dead man. The woman in the family had since broken off from the group to play with her baby. Even though she had to fight to keep her smile, she had that beautiful motherly bond with the little boy as they played Peek-a-Boo. This was her life and although she was doomed to die, she made the most of the final moments.

And that was Billy's Eureka moment. He could cheer himself up by living! There were all these risks he'd always wanted to take, and although there had always been something keeping him from achieving what he wanted, now he had the perfect excuse: it was the last chance.

He surrendered to his mother and grabbed the phone. He punched in Ethan's number. "Hey, dude, you remember that old red wagon in your garage? It's time to bring it out into the sun again."

* * *

><p>At the top of Whiplash Peak, you could see just how far the deciduous trees stretched beyond the Estates. At the top of Whiplash Peak, the only wildlife that dared come near were the chirping bluebirds. And at the top of Whiplash Peak, it would be a twenty-foot fall down a pebbly slope right before smashing into the back wall of the sheriff's office.<p>

Well, if you weren't careful.

Billy's grip on the tiny red wagon's handle loosened as he peered over the edge of Whiplash Peak. The toy didn't stand a chance against the highest hill in town. But quietly, he exhaled his apprehension. "Well, here we go. You all ready, dude?"

Ethan nervously fiddled with adjusting the strap under his neck. "This helmet smells like cheese," he said.

"Now _that's _how to live in the moment," Billy said, clapping his best friend on the back. "Come on." He knelt to take his seat in the wagon, but to his shock, there was nothing there. "Where . . . did the wagon go?"

"It's over here!" Sue called. As her boyfriend was gawking with his mouth open over the side of the hill, she'd grabbed the wagon from his limp hand and dragged it several feet to the left.

Billy slumped his shoulders and walked to her. "Why?"

"The ground is so much smoother over here," Sue replied. "Oh, Billy, this is already dangerous. Why not lessen the risk just a _little bit?" _

There certainly were fewer loose rocks down the stretch of land Sue had chosen. Whenever Billy had imagined doing this before, though, it had never been complete without the thought of rusty wheels bumping off big pebbles, jostling him violently until he crashed. But Sue had the handle in a death grip. She wasn't going to let the boys down that hill unless she had a strong guarantee of their safety.

Billy had dreamed about doing this stunt since Ethan got the wagon at age five. He had no choice but to surrender. He sighed and squatted down in the seat of the little toy. He motioned for Ethan to come over and grabbed the sides of the wagon.

"This seemed so much less awkward when we could both actually fit in this thing," Ethan mused as he hesitantly sat down behind his friend. His arms were around Billy's shoulders and he was kneeling so his knees splayed to either side of the blond boy. Sue had to stifle a laugh.

"It'll be over within mere seconds, dude," said Billy, trying to act like his masculinity was not being harmed at all. "You wanna give us a push, baby?"

Sue bit a crimson-glossed lip and for a moment she seemed like she would hold onto the wagon's handle forever. But then she sighed, and no sooner than Billy heard her breathe, "Okay," the wagon was shooting down the side of Whiplash Peak.

The wheels didn't roll so much as they did rust over until they were useless. The top of the hill was smooth enough (Billy would have turned back to thank Sue if Ethan wasn't holding on to him so tightly), but once a stagnant wheel hit the first larger-than-average rock, friction got the best of them.

Fifteen feet from the bottom of the hill, Billy was rocketing straight into the air with the girlish, tearful screams of his best friend drumming into his brain. He felt all of the blood rush to his head quite suddenly. He managed to open his eyes long enough to see that they were now completely upside down. He gripped the sides of the wagon with all the strength his fingers could muster as the rusted-up children's toy finished its 360 and sent the two of them crashing down to their doom.

Billy's entire body rattled back and forth as the wheels smashed into the bottom of the hill. The horrific journey was almost over, but not before the sharp incline between the bottom of Whiplash Peak and flat ground tipped the wagon over. Something that had a high-pitched shriek flew over Billy's head as he did a straight faceplant, still holding the wagon over him.

"Oh my God! Billy Bunny!" Sue shouted. In a split second, she was helping to lift Billy up. "God, your hair's all dirty! And so are your pants – are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine," Billy said groggily, dizzily trying to stand up straight. "What happened to–"

From several feet away, Ethan groaned. He'd shot out of the wagon when it landed – kind of like a human cannonball, he thought – and his head had connected with the brick wall of the sheriff's office. And the pain didn't stop there. His body caught up with him and slammed front-first into the wall, his legs scraping down the wall as he came to a complete stop.

Thank heavens he'd worn the helmet.

Billy and Sue both ran to him. "Oh God, are _you _okay?" Sue said.

"Yeah," Ethan answered unconvincingly. He kept falling over as he tried to right himself. "Only I'm throwing that wagon away."

"What is going on back here?" shouted a voice dashing around the sheriff's office. Moments later, the three kids were staring up into the face of Officer Roderick Splinkley, the very tall, very handsome Chief of Police who wore his gold badge like a cape. He stood with hands on hips, feet spread apart, and shoulders wide – _always_ on the job.

"What are you kids up to?" he wondered with a scowl.

Sue raised a hand while she tried to keep Ethan from collapsing. "They were just trying out a harmless stunt. I promise it'll never happen again, Splinkley."

"I hope it doesn't. I was watching the game when I heard a banging sound outside my office. And a policeman must react to a banging sound. You know why?" Officer Splinkley swept his hair back and gave the teens his coldest, most smug eye twinkle. "Because it means trouble's on the horizon, and trouble means there's justice to be had!"

Billy was all ready to apologize and get the hell out of there, but the officer was riding high on his stupid heroic cloud. So Billy interrupted with, "Which game _were _you watching, exactly?"

Officer Splinkley frowned and slunk his shoulders. "Just . . . just stay out of my hair, okay, kids?" he said. "This is your warning." With that, he marched back around the police station to get back to watching his Rachael Ray.

Once the officer was gone, the three teens turned to each other, bodies still aching from the fall.

"Yeah, Billy? This was fun, but I don't think I'm gonna do any more of these 'adventures,'" Ethan said.

* * *

><p>"So, what you kids are saying is, you wanna get drunk?"<p>

"Yeah." Billy nodded his head firmly. Nutcase was sitting in front of him, surrounded by half-full bottles of liquor. For a couple years now, Billy had looked forward to being the age where he could get a hold on the stuff legally. But now that the time might never come, he was relying on his good friend Nutcase.

Nutcase was 25 years old and had fallen off the wagon soon after he left college. For years, he'd been the cool, wacky big kid that the group looked up to. Now, of course, he was the cool, wacky, insane, extreme adult that the group looked up to. They didn't want to become alcoholics, of course, but they wanted the experience – Nutcase always looked like he was having so much fun!

"Well . . . alright . . . " Nutcase said, though he looked wary. "One bottle for all of ya. But just beer. It isn't strong. And I don't like it as much. 'Cause it's not as strong." He stumbled to his cabinet in the back, all the while keeping a watchful eye on the rest of his stash.

Sue gave Nick's hand a quick squeeze. Nick smiled falteringly in response. The red-haired girl was, as usual, nervous. She'd always said that one day, she'd do something a little daring. "I'm still not sure that I'm ready for this," she whispered.

Nutcase came back several minutes later (all his missteps slowed him down significantly) with a six-pack of light beers. "Just, um, don't drink too much, okay? The stuff is still all mine." He paused. "And, y'know, I care about you kids!"

Billy grinned and snatched a bottle out of the case, which seemed to visibly wound Nutcase. Sue was more cautious in her taking and opening of the beer, but not so much as Nick. Nick acted somewhat as if the alcohol repelled her hand. Nutcase, who was at this point instinctively clutching the six-pack to his chest, looked relieved, but only before Sue did her friend a favor and took a bottle for her.

Once they were all open, Billy cheered "L'chaim!" and they each raised the bottle to their lips. Billy practically poured the beer down his throat, which he regretted. "Oh, yuck!" he coughed, splattering the bitter drink all over Nutcase's jacket.

Sue also grimaced. "Ew," she muttered as the alcohol washed down her throat.

"Oh, well, if you don't like it, I guess you guys can just go," Nutcase decided, yanking the bottles protectively out of Billy and Sue's hands. He was about to take Nick's as well, but she pulled away.

"Wait! I haven't tried it yet!" she said.

Nutcase was desperate to get his precious drinks back. "But they think it's disgusting, Nikki! That's enough for you, isn't it?"

Nick shook her head. "No. I'm doing this." She turned her back to Nutcase and prepared herself with a few deep breaths. Her teeth started to quiver as she brought the bottle to her lips and for a moment it seemed she would opt out, but she was determined – with a whimper, she splashed a teeny sip into her mouth.

Everyone watched anxiously, anticipating for her to start crying or have an attack.

But she smiled. "This isn't half bad!" she said. She was about to take a second sip, but a knock on the door interrupted.

"Open up, Santoya!" It was Officer Splinkley.

"He'll see us drinking!" Billy whispered. "Guys, hide!"

Sue quickly found just the place. "Quick, we'll hide in that closet!"

Billy and Sue both started running, but Nick stayed put. Billy turned around. "Nick, what are you doing?"

"I can't move! I'm too drunk!" Nick whined.

Billy sighed and hurriedly helped her bumbling body over to the hall closet. "You've only had one sip," he muttered as he crouched behind the sliding door and sat Nick down on a pile of liquor-stained coats. Sue closed the door and they each fell perfectly silent.

From the closet, they could hear the whole scene: the front door swinging open and slamming shut, followed by the proud clomp of Officer Splinkley's boots.

"Well, well, if it isn't Patrick Santoya, rampant alcoholic and anarchist," Splinkley boomed. "Fess up, buddy, I know I saw those kids come in here. And there's only one reason anyone would come to your house – you're providing alcohol to minors, aren't you?"

"I don't know _what _you're talking about," Nutcase slurred. His tone of voice suggested he was grinning with no good reason, which could mean he was acting nonchalant or was just being regular old Nutcase.

"I suggest you own up. Otherwise, I'll have to take both you _and _the kids in." The sound of jingling handcuffs was followed by the sound of unfamiliar giddy chuckling.

Wait.

The chuckling was coming from inside the closet.

"_Nick! _You're not drunk!" Sue whispered.

"Then why am I feeling so . . . so . . . light and airy . . . " Nick replied. With that, she collapsed with a loud _bang. _

Billy and Sue both gasped. And suddenly, the voices outside the closet were silent as well. "What was that?" inquired Officer Splinkley through audibly clenched teeth.

"That was just . . . um, those were my pet _chickens,_" came Nutcase's answer.

"No, Santoya, it was not your chickens."

"You sure? Those chickens are loud with their pecking and honking and all that shit. Know what I'm sayin'?"

"Chickens – which, if you really do have them, is another matter for us to discuss entirely – don't make banging sounds. I know my banging sounds." (Was it just Billy, or was Splinkley's voice getting closer?) "Because when there are banging sounds, it means trouble's on the horizon, and trouble means there's justice to be had!"

Oh yes, the officer was most definitely getting closer. Crap. "Billy, we need to hide!" Sue whispered.

"We're already hiding, Sue!"

"I mean, we need to hide more!" She demonstrated by digging her feet under the piles of dust-gathering jackets and ducked behind the ones that were lucky enough to still be hanging. She kicked more clothes over Nick's unconscious body. Billy widened his eyes in understanding and followed suit.

And he did it just in time. Seconds later, the outside light intruded their hiding space. "I know you're in here!" Officer Splinkley shouted.

Billy squeezed his eyes shut. _Don't move, girls. Don't move, _he prayed silently as he felt the officer's eagle eyes soar around the closet.

And to his relief, he heard a defeated sigh from Officer Splinkley. "Well, I don't see them in there, Santoya. But I'm gonna keep my eye on you, you hear?"

"Yep. No problem, copper. Now get outta my house, will ya?"

The front door opened and slammed again, and Billy and Sue both peeked out from behind the hanging jackets. They gave each other relieved smiles.

"I think we should leave," Sue whispered.

"Good idea."

* * *

><p>Over the next couple of weeks, Billy got away with so much. He mixed together dangerous chemicals with Lombard and Sue (with some oversight from Ty Sifford). He built a huge and awesome skateboard ramp with Ethan's cousin Allen and Sue, although it later turned out to be faulty and broke. And then he went shopping with Petunia and Sue and let them max out his dad's credit card. Officer Splinkley kept trying to stop him, but Sue was a master at faking him out.<p>

Afterwards, though, Billy felt suddenly depressed. He'd lived like he'd always wanted, all within two weeks. And there was still year left before his doom. Sure, he'd have school. But that hardly counted as fun.

Good God, he needed more! There had to be one more thing left in that town that he could use to get one more thrill.

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><p><strong>AN: Character update:**

**Officer Splinkley is Splendid.**

**Another chapter is coming up soon! **


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